Chase your own dragons and leave other people’s alone!

October 7, 2013

Quick fix anecdotes are way better than creating your own well-being. As my insurgence into my thirties continues, I can’t help but feel an oft pious air from many an ignorant recluse who cannot, or safely will not, fathom ease at believing to be & live in freedom. A freedom that they could, at the most part, possibly never ascertain to experience. Instead, herding by numbers seems secure. My quick fix tonic of consuming energy is creating a fantasy alter ego that lives in pictures conjured up by me or magician photographers who also enjoy telling a story caught in single images. I’m chasing my dragon.

Women socializing around women can be a treacherous experience, should you be female. Yea, we’re generally la-di-da peace loving creatures who all dream of puffed up cupcake dresses with the unyielding desire to prevail as brides with dreams of birthing a plethora of little beings made in our own image & that of Prince Charming.

Ho-hum

Savone_Memoirs_of_a_Bald_Bride_JDRP-154

This dear dame unwittingly became punk-ish! She started balding and instead of becoming entirely embarrassed about it the slowly started accepting it. Click on the link to her story on her difficulty and efforts of a new normal.

Fantasy is very important to our daily grind. So much so, that without it, we’d just be truly and thoroughly dull people. Take my friend *Joe, for instance. *Joe is not his real name, but for the sake at feigning an attempt to hide his identity, I give him the pseudonym *Joe.

So, take my friend *Joe. If *Joe did not have an intense fascination with flying & an attraction of one day becoming a pilot (he’s 48, I’m no dream crusher, but I doubt he’ll become a pilot anytime soon) with a vast collection of toy airplane models and other aero paraphernalia accommodated by a strooong dose of aviophobia, then *Joe would just be a dude that is afraid to fly.

But his fantasy keeps him alive, stable and physically occupied. It’s his beast to conquer.

Us social mortals have a sanctimonious habit of seeking permission to live out, legal, parts of our fantasies, or permission to be at ease with inner selves along with a need for the all-powerful “OK” stamp on an invisible passport into social acceptance.

Well, well, well, I herewith provide you with a list of my top five people who I’ve never ever met and probably never ever will meet, that have indirectly influenced my sense of self. They have created their own “I’m-A-OK” stamp and they sold it well.

#1 Dolly Parton & Brenda Fassie!

The sight and sound of Brenda Fassie generally makes me feel happy. The thought of her conjures up pleasant childhood memories.

images: Left, getty images, center- last.fm, right- afripopmag.com

images: Left, getty images, center- last.fm, right- afripopmag.com

 

 

 

WHOA! Miss Parton is my all-time hero. Greatest all-time hero of ALL time. I need to write an entire dialogue to express my deepest gratitude to her! Instead, I’ll administer this little gem from her.

images: Left- The River Unbroken 1987 album cover, Second from left- promo poster, third from left-Dolly Playboy Bunny 1978, far right- pinkisthenewblog.com

images: Left- The River Unbroken 1987 album cover, Second from left- promo poster, third from left-Dolly Playboy Bunny 1978, far right- pinkisthenewblog.com

 

 

 

 

#2 Grace Jones

I know right? Why didn’t I list her at number one, right? Growing up, my dad used to call me Princess Grace Jones or Princess Brenda Fassie. I still do adore both artists and actively still do emulate their stances in the mirror and belt out their lyrics softly when I’m in the shower. Miss Dolly I placed at #1 as she somehow has a pleasant way of saying “Fuck your beauty standards, I’ll create my own and build an empire!”

images: left, second left & far right- pleasemagazine.com, Second right- James Bond 007 A View for a kill promo poster 1985

images: left, second left & far right- pleasemagazine.com, Second right- James Bond 007 A View for a kill promo poster 1985

 

 

 

 

#3 Just Miss Paris

She’s just hooot. I’d hate to “objectify” women as, to me, a woman dressed as virginal as Joss Stone and the likes, can be just as sexualised and objectified as any half naked woman. Misogynistic crassness doesn’t care for wardrobe, the only difference is that the less clothes the easier it is to justify the crass viewer’s behavior/ commentary;  the more clothes equal the more conniving and underhanded the bladed lust. My experience from being demure is that the perverts are the ones you least expect to whisper disgusting things in passing when you’re usual attire is close to that of a burqa.

Such a detour of thoughts, inspired by this alternative model of which I know so little about. I, in all earnesty, have tried to find out more about Just Miss Paris, other than her being born in Germany and that she is a Hip-Hop industry model.

images: cutiecentral.com & tokenblackgirl.com

images: cutiecentral.com & tokenblackgirl.com

 

 

 

 

#4 Samantha Lebbie

She is my unicorn. That is all.

images: tokenblackgirl.com; Full Blossom magazine cover

images: tokenblackgirl.com; Full Blossom magazine cover

 

 

 

 

#5 Stacey McKenzie

The Jamaican born beauty defies everything that is normal. I’m not into super model fandom and I’d never purchase anything they’re marketing. But I admire this lady’s tenacity at spinning around constant rejecting for model jobs and eventually got what she wanted. I love everything about her!

http://www.theeyecasting.com/blog/tag/stacey-mckenzie/

images: left- Sirthy & Pratha, centre- clutchmagonline.com, far right- Toronto Life Magazine

images: left- Sirthy & Pratha, centre- clutchmagonline.com, far right- Toronto Life Magazine

 

 

 

 

The existence of these dear darlings have somehow morphed the idea into my, below average IQ’d, brain, that it is “OK” to just do SOMETHING with in life and not just stagnate into obscurity.

Currently, in my life,It is frequently escalating to awkward as me being “the eccentric friend”. But, albeit slowly, I am finding like minded people through the back splash that is my  hobby I have selected which is creating myself as a niche, so that I can open up minds and doors for other socially awkward penguins.

Yes, tattoos are mainstream now . Having tattoos is even less exclusionary even. Yes, it slowly gladdens me that it is so, as the topic as a whole opens up the idea that maybe, just MAYBE, tattoo stereo types are not just trailer trash, bikers with beards, Pamela Anderson, Pop starts acting “tough”/ “cool”, prostitutes, porn stars, gangsters and teenagers who lied about their age to the tattoo artist. The ever annoying growth & normalization of the craft indicates that, soon, barely an eyelid will flutter at the sight of skin with pictures on it. In fact, I don’t even mind fueling the “commercialization” of the industry, to an extent.

The World is huuuuge. It is also estimated that it is filled with somewhat 7,116,100,000 human beings.

So, go ahead and chase your own dragon.

The more lavish the walls and intricate the facades we construct to keep the perceived monsters at bay; the more we’re all just a little more vulnerable than we think.

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